Sleeplessness - A Walk Down Memory Lane!

When Kimi was a baby, she slept in a crib in our foyer. At the time, we were living in a small one-bedroom apartment in Queens, NY. Not a lot of room for anything, so we made do as best we could. Kimi was a night owl from the beginning - not really settling down until around 2am. Fortunately, she would sleep for 5-6 hours so I could get a bit of contiguous sleep! There were nights when she had a harder time falling asleep. She would be fine if I stood up & held her, but fussed even if I tried to sit. Those were difficult nights & sometimes Phil would take over so I could rest, even though he had work the next morning. As Kimi turned around 9-10 months old, she developed a strong dislike for her crib, no way was she going to sleep in there! This coincided with her becoming very sick during a visit at my parents' house. From that point on, she awakened every night at the same time that she had awakened sick. She was unhappy & made it very clear to us that we needed a new plan. We soon discovered that we could place her down on big flat floor pillows without complaint, so we took apart her crib & put her crib mattress down on the floor in the corner where her crib used to be. It worked! She didn't complain or fuss. We set up her little stuffed friends around the area & she had a little den for herself. At night, instead of calling out to be nursed, she would crawl down the short hall to our bedroom & over to my side of the bed. I would nurse her back sleep & Phil often would take her back to her bed after. But sometimes, Phil didn't wake up to move her & we all simply slumbered away until morning. I felt better rested those nights, but we both worried about rolling over onto Kimi & found it hard to adopt this as a habit. So, Kimi was still frequently moved out of our bed, and this continued until we moved up to MA, right after I found out I was pregnant with Shaun.

We moved into my grandparents' house while we searched for our future home, which took the entire summer. Kimi was set up on her little floor mattress in the converted attic room that was our private space/bedroom. When we moved to our new house in the fall, Kimi got a brand new room all to herself, complete with a "big girl" bed. I painted a cave on her wall with a chalkboard paint center & hung dinosaur posters all over the walls. She had another "den", although this one was a bit bigger than the previous!

The baby's room was set up, too. We didn't know if Baby was going to be a boy or a girl, but we did know that Baby was going to share our bed. Co-sleeping, or creating a family bed, seemed more plausible to us. We learned more about it, and realized that the cases of babies being harmed by parents rolling over them were in fact due to the parents being impaired in some way (often alcohol or drug use). In fact, co-sleeping seemed to reduce the incidence of SIDS. We decided to try it with the new baby.

Shaun was born in the early afternoon in December, at home. My parents witnessed his birth & Kimi, who was 2 years 3 months old, climbed into bed mere minutes after his arrival & covered him with hugs & kisses. My grandparents came over & we enjoyed a beautiful evening in front of the fire with the Christmas tree a-twinkling. Around 10pm I was ready for bed & carried my sweet boy into bed with me. He only woke to nurse that first night & when I awakened in the morning I felt well-rested & comfortable. It was wonderful!! Each night continued the pattern. Shaun would settle down for sleep next to me & only wake enough to nurse. I was better rested with two littles than I had been with my one. Often, Kimi would join us (thank goodness we had a King-sized bed!) & sometimes she would nap with him during the day. (Neither of my kids were big nappers - once a day for a couple of hours was it, & even that was given up in their toddlerhood.)

I am so glad we decided to have a family bed. There were times, especially as they got older, bigger & squirmier, when we would have appreciated having the bed to ourselves, but all-in-all, I know that our lives, & the emotional lives of our children, were improved by sharing our bed.